I<\/p>\n
1 I want a hero: an uncommon want,
\n2 When every year and month sends forth a new one,
\n3 Till, after cloying the gazettes with cant,
\n4 The age discovers he is not the true one;
\n5 Of such as these I should not care to vaunt,
\n6 I’ll therefore take our ancient friend Don Juan,
\n7 We all have seen him, in the pantomime,
\n8 Sent to the Devil somewhat ere his time.<\/p>\n
II<\/p>\n
9 Vernon, the butcher Cumberland, Wolfe, Hawke,
\n10 Prince Ferdinand, Granby, Burgoyne, Keppel, Howe,
\n11 Evil and good, have had their tithe of talk,
\n12 And filled their sign-posts then, like Wellesley now;
\n13 Each in their turn like Banquo’s monarchs stalk,
\n14 Followers of fame, “nine farrow” of that sow:
\n15 France, too, had Buonapart\u00e9 and Dumourier
\n16 Recorded in the Moniteur and Courier.<\/p>\n
III<\/p>\n
17 Barnave, Brissot, Condorcet, Mirabeau,
\n18 P\u00e9tion, Clootz, Danton, Marat, La Fayette
\n19 Were French, and famous people, as we know;
\n20 And there were others, scarce forgotten yet,
\n21 Joubert, Hoche, Marceau, Lannes, Desaix, Moreau,
\n22 With many of the military set,
\n23 Exceedingly remarkable at times,
\n24 But not at all adapted to my rhymes.<\/p>\n
IV<\/p>\n
25 Nelson was once Britannia’s god of War,
\n26 And still should be so, but the tide is turn’d;
\n27 There’s no more to be said of Trafalgar,
\n28 ‘Tis with our hero quietly inurn’d;
\n29 Because the army’s grown more popular,
\n30 At which the naval people are concern’d;
\n31 Besides, the Prince is all for the land-service,
\n32 Forgetting Duncan, Nelson, Howe, and Jervis.<\/p>\n
V<\/p>\n
33 Brave men were living before Agamemnon
\n34 And since, exceeding valorous and sage,
\n35 A good deal like him too, though quite the same none;
\n36 But then they shone not on the poet’s page,
\n37 And so have been forgotten: I condemn none,
\n38 But can’t find any in the present age
\n39 Fit for my poem (that is, for my new one);
\n40 So, as I said, I’ll take my friend Don Juan.<\/p>\n
VI<\/p>\n
41 Most epic poets plunge “in medias res”
\n42 (Horace makes this the heroic turnpike road),
\n43 And then your hero tells, whene’er you please,
\n44 What went before–by way of episode,
\n45 While seated after dinner at his ease,
\n46 Beside his mistress in some soft abode,
\n47 Palace, or garden, paradise, or cavern,
\n48 Which serves the happy couple for a tavern.<\/p>\n
VII<\/p>\n
49 That is the usual method, but not mine–
\n50 My way is to begin with the beginning;
\n51 The regularity of my design
\n52 Forbids all wandering as the worst of sinning,
\n53 And therefore I shall open with a line
\n54 (Although it cost me half an hour in spinning),
\n55 Narrating somewhat of Don Juan’s father,
\n56 And also of his mother, if you’d rather. …
\nCC<\/p>\n
1593 My poem’s epic, and is meant to be
\n1594 Divided in twelve books; each book containing,
\n1595 With love, and war, a heavy gale at sea,
\n1596 A list of ships, and captains, and kings reigning,
\n1597 New characters; the episodes are three:
\n1598 A panoramic view of Hell’s in training,
\n1599 After the style of Virgil and of Homer,
\n1600 So that my name of Epic’s no misnomer.<\/p>\n
CCI<\/p>\n
1601 All these things will be specified in time,
\n1602 With strict regard to Aristotle’s rules,
\n1603 The Vade Mecum of the true sublime,
\n1604 Which makes so many poets, and some fools:
\n1605 Prose poets like blank-verse, I’m fond of rhyme,
\n1606 Good workmen never quarrel with their tools;
\n1607 I’ve got new mythological machinery,
\n1608 And very handsome supernatural scenery.<\/p>\n
CCII<\/p>\n
1609 There’s only one slight difference between
\n1610 Me and my epic brethren gone before,
\n1611 And here the advantage is my own, I ween,
\n1612 (Not that I have not several merits more,
\n1613 But this will more peculiarly be seen);
\n1614 They so embellish, that ’tis quite a bore
\n1615 Their labyrinth of fables to thread through,
\n1616 Whereas this story’s actually true.<\/p>\n
CCIII<\/p>\n
1617 If any person doubt it, I appeal
\n1618 To history, tradition, and to facts,
\n1619 To newspapers, whose truth all know and feel,
\n1620 To plays in five, and operas in three acts;
\n1621 All these confirm my statement a good deal,
\n1622 But that which more completely faith exacts
\n1623 Is, that myself, and several now in Seville,
\n1624 Saw Juan’s last elopement with the Devil.<\/p>\n
CCIV<\/p>\n
1625 If ever I should condescend to prose,
\n1626 I’ll write poetical commandments, which
\n1627 Shall supersede beyond all doubt all those
\n1628 That went before; in these I shall enrich
\n1629 My text with many things that no one knows,
\n1630 And carry precept to the highest pitch:
\n1631 I’ll call the work “Longinus o’er a Bottle,
\n1632 Or, Every Poet his own Aristotle.”<\/p>\n
CCV<\/p>\n
1633 Thou shalt believe in Milton, Dryden, Pope;
\n1634 Thou shalt not set up Wordsworth, Coleridge, Southey;
\n1635 Because the first is craz’d beyond all hope,
\n1636 The second drunk, the third so quaint and mouthy:
\n1637 With Crabbe it may be difficult to cope,
\n1638 And Campbell’s Hippocrene is somewhat drouthy:
\n1639 Thou shalt not steal from Samuel Rogers, nor
\n1640 Commit–flirtation with the muse of Moore.<\/p>\n
CCVI<\/p>\n
1641 Thou shalt not covet Mr. Sotheby’s Muse,
\n1642 His Pegasus, nor anything that’s his;
\n1643 Thou shalt not bear false witness like “the Blues”
\n1644 (There’s one, at least, is very fond of this);
\n1645 Thou shalt not write, in short, but what I choose:
\n1646 This is true criticism, and you may kiss–
\n1647 Exactly as you please, or not–the rod;
\n1648 But if you don’t, I’ll lay it on, by God!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I 1 I want a hero: an uncommon want, 2 When every year and month sends forth a new one, 3 Till, after cloying the gazettes with cant, 4 The age discovers he is not the true one; 5 Of such as these I should not care to vaunt, 6 I’ll therefore take our ancient […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[11],"tags":[],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/englishhistory.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/560"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/englishhistory.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/englishhistory.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/englishhistory.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/englishhistory.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=560"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/englishhistory.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/560\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/englishhistory.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=560"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/englishhistory.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=560"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/englishhistory.net\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=560"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}